Dear Future Twin Mama…
First off, let me just say……..you are in for one wild, magical, beautiful, and chaotic ride As a twin myself, I can tell you that there’s not a day that goes by without me and my sister checking in with each other. It’s a bond like no other, and now you’re about to experience that magic with your little ones!!!!!
I wish someone had told me all the crazy, beautiful truths of being a twin mum, so I'm here to share them with you. As a fellow twin mumma, this is my way of passing along what I’ve learned, because you’re not alone in this wild journey!
Embrace the Phases
One of the biggest surprises I learned along the way is that everything comes in phases, both the good times and the not-so-great ones. You might find yourself in the middle of a sleepless night or a sibling showdown, but guess what?
It’ll pass faster than you can say “double trouble! Just keep reminding yourself: this too shall pass. Before you know it, they’ll be onto their next adventure, and you’ll have made it through the tough spots stronger and wiser.
Get Night-time Help (Mum... Nana... Anyone?)
If I could turn back time, I’d definitely splurge on some nighttime help!! Sleep deprivation is real, and even a few hours of uninterrupted sleep can feel like winning the lottery. So, if someone offers to help out at night, take them up on it. Trust me, you'll thank yourself later. Between your raging hormones, your husband’s attempts to rebalance things, and the babies not yet sleep trained... you NEED it!!!!!!
If I could give one piece of advice to new parents, it would be this!
Don't let the schedule control everything. Sometimes, you just need to pause, let go, and be in the moment with your babies, because those quiet, loving moments are the ones you'll look back on the most.
Cherish One-on-One Time
My biggest regret is that I stuck so rigidly to the 3-hour schedule feed, nappy change, pump, REPEAT!!! I was so focused on the routine, trying to stay on track with the clock, that I wonder if I missed out on fully embracing my tiny little babies. With twins, it often feels like you're always in juggling mode, trying to keep up with both of their needs.
But if I could go back, I’d tell myself to carve out those special one-on-one moments with each of them. Even in the chaos, those little bonding times would have been some of my most cherished memories. And honestly, it’s a great excuse to sneak in some cuddles when they’re not both fighting for your attention (which is pretty much my life now!).
Dress Them Alike, But Celebrate Their Uniqueness
In the early days I was as uper sucker for dressing them alike its super cute and can save you time, but someone reminded me, they’re two unique little personalities! Encourage their individual likes and dislikes. After all, they’re not just mini versions of each other. They’ll thank you for it later!
Right now I don't really have a choice- one of my girls is on Day 5 with only wanting to wear “the pink unicorn dress”!!
Accept Help & Build a Support System
Don’t hesitate to accept help from family, friends, or hire a doula if it fits your needs. Caring for twins can be a lot, so having extra hands around will make a huge difference.Patience is key, my friend.
And for those of you expecting twins, soak in this time of patiently waiting for them to arrive even if it feels like you’re a bored beached whale, and told to be on bed rest. “I don't even know the meaning of bored now!!”
You Will Get Through!!!
Remember, this stage is just a blink in the grand scheme of things. My girls are so close now, which is the absolute best part of being a twin mum. I was nervous about having twins at first, but let me tell you
it’s a once-in-a-lifetime experience for the lucky few. You’ll cherish this bond as they grow, just like my sister and I do.
Keep them on the same feeding schedule—trust me, it’s a game changer!
Also, don’t forget to take care of yourself! It’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of parenting, but a little self-care goes a long way. Whether it’s a quiet cup of coffee, a quick chat with a friend, or (if you’re really stretching it) a bath and time to wash your hair or shave those legs, make time for you!
Enjoy the Experience
There’s something magical about watching two babies grow up together, who will develop the most special bond.
Capture all the many Memories, Twins are a blessing, and taking photos, journaling, or making videos will help you cherish the journey as it goes by quickly.
Lastly, celebrate the little wins. Every tiny milestone, first steps, first words, or just a peaceful nap…..is worth a little dance party.
So here’s to you mama - have patience, love fiercely, and know that you’ve got this! You’re doing an amazing job, and this journey is one you’ll look back on with a smile (and maybe a laugh or two!).
With all my love and support,
Alana – your twin mum 💕
